Taeradun wrote:Taeradun :
> attempt communication with jungle woman
> find that not even protoss telepathy works on the jungle woman's primative mind
> get captured by a zerg force that suddenly appears and taken away to a zerg prison
> meet primative protoss and a few more primative terrans at the prison who all act like animals and are unable to communicate
> use badass psionic powerz to fight off zerg guards and break out of prison cell
> run and find jungle woman's cell and free her
> escape riding on a bengalaas
> find remnants of a famous protoss statue on a beach
> YOU MANIACS! YOU BLEW IT UP! GOD DAMN YOU! GOD DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!
> use iPhone to try and meet up with any NPC protoss survivors on THE PLANET AIUR WHICH IN A SURPRISING TWIST IT ACTUALLY WAS ALL ALONG OMFG so we can raid the zerg base and rescue DOCTOR NOSEBONE
The jungle woman found Taeradun odd as Taeradun only made some odd rings inside her head and Taeradun's eyes did look funny.
A greater queen was around, did spot Taeradun and used an improved Ensnare that truly binds him in space like inside some web. The queen takes the web with Taeradun and went into a overly guarded Hive. Thus Tareadun was captured. Taeradun was sick from their smell as their lack of hygiene sure don't help at all. Zerglings eating strange stuff that sticks to their teeth. But the worse is that Taeradun nearly fainted as a nearby Ultralisk did fart to satisfy its natural needs.
What? The Zerg did experiment on Terran and Protoss to make them more dumb? After Taeradun tried to communicate with them by telepathy but failed. However, they clearly seem from some civilized world by appearance and their clothes.
Taeradun enters in a deep concentration and blows up the minds of all Zerg in its close vicinity allowing him to escape.
Taeradun frees jungle woman that was kidnapped by the Zerg as well. As Taeradun was about to make a standard "run for it", the jungle woman calls for some beast ... which ends up being a bengalaas.
As they escape, Taeradun had to ride off the bengalaas as he saw a broken Protoss statue. Taeradun became furious as someone broke a heritage of his people.
In a "desperate" attempt to find civilization, he uses his iPhone from Earth and he manages to make contact. He contacted a Protoss base and he found out it was the planet Aiur.
However ... why Earth and Aiur are so damn close to each other? Some space distortion has happened make them near each other.
Anyway, Taeradun arrives at the Protoss Base with the bengalass along with the jungle woman to eventually plan the attack ...
Milldawg wrote:Doctor Nosebone : Doctor Nosebone befriends a kindly zergling whom he hides in the folds of his garbage bag. When the guards are off feasting on the flesh of the weak, the zergling (named Melissa) retrieves his weapons. Doctor Nosebone squeezes some viscous fluid from his dildo and spreads it around the door of the jail (which, since it is a zerg jail, is more like a rock wedged in a hole). Then he scrapes his pointy stick around the ground until it ignites, and touches it to the fluid, which is plastic explosive. The door explodes, and Doctor Nosebone escapes!
>Nosebone acquires pet - Zergling
Just then, dragoons begin bombarding the zerg camp. It is Taeradun's attack force! But he does not know that Nosebone has already escaped, since Nosebone's psionic powers are not yet strong enough for communication. The only thing he can do with them is to access the internet remotely and perform Google searches. In any case, Nosebone and Melissa duck and weave amid the attack of the dragoons, unable to find Taeradun and tell him to cut it out already.
As Nosebone and Melissa make their way through the camp, a piece of hydralisk comes whirling out of nowhere, propelled by a dragoon's blast, and smacks Nosebone in the side of the head. He is knocked unconscious.
Melissa's only hope is to find Taeradun, somehow indicate that she is not hostile, convince him to stop the bombardment, and lead him to Nosebone's unconscious body. Melissa bravely works her way toward the source of the bombardment, but as soon as the dragoons see her, she gets zapped.
>Nosebone loses pet - Zergling
It is only a matter of chance now...will Taeradun stumble upon Nosebone, buried somewhere under hydralisk parts, or will his body get incinerated by the relentless attack of the dragoons?
Taeradun's attack forces did win the battle against the Zerg base. Then Tareadun searched around for Doctor Nosebone to find him dead but has most of its vital organs working in addition of his brain.
Somehow the Protoss sucks to properly revive people after all their years of technology thus ...
Doctor Nosebone wakes up, he believes he is in some kind of water "tank" but somehow could breathe. He hears someone ....
"Welcome back" said the voice.
He sees Taeradun in some oddly water-waving shape. Taeradun told him what happened ...
Doctor Nosebone is now inside a Dragoon equipped with 6 "arms" that can carry 4 of his "traditional" dildos and 2 "mechanical" dildos to repair robotic-like surfaces.
Now Taeradun and "Dildo Dragoon" Doctor Nosebone are now inside the Protoss base and ponders what they should do next.
