Ok I tested your campaign this is what I got so far:
Map 1:
- Mission briefing has a few grammatical and spelling errors. Go through all your text, put it through a spell check, read it out loud, and then read it in game. I'd also recommend slowing down the text a bit and make it a bit more legible. Here is a link to help you with that:
http://www.campaigncreations.org/starcr ... text.shtml
- Don't give the enemy science vessels irradiate... they'll target your hero and kill her. I wouldn't recommend giving the computer that much power since heroes aren't disposable.
- Be more clear in your mission objectives on what to do. For instance for the rescue battlecruiser objective you could say destroy all defenses around the crashed battlecruiser or something.
- Remove the map revealer after you take out the ion cannon.
- Have the commander guy or whoever say something after the ion cannon is destroyed. I just randomly got some uints and buildings (very nice how you did that though).
- Whats with the 2 abandoned addons by the supply depot/marine squad you get?
- Make sure the dropship gathers all the scvs (I think it missed 2 of them because I saw them on some random island).
- Have some more talk after you get the battlecruiser. Whats it for? why are you getting it?
- Minerals/gas are too plentiful and spread out. I'd have less minerals and places to mine, but have them bunched up closer together. I had 5 command centers up and running, and I could have gotten more if I wanted lol.
- Where did Miss January go? Have someone pick her up or something lol. Stuff randomly happening without the player knowing whats going on usually isnt good.
- Overall it wasn't a bad first map, you seem to have a pretty decent knowing of triggers and the editor. Terrain was alright, seemed a bit open in places (I can tell you like big maps) and a bit scare in detail in places (due to the openness).
- Have you considered making a custom EXE for the campaign? Simple graphic and data edits can really change your campaign and make it unique.
Map 2:
- Ok where did Zerg come into the picture! Whats this all about! Then I started the mission and I got the terrans. At least u had someone tell me where to go there. I would get rid of the fog of war for that part of the mission since the way you have to go is pretty straight forward.
- Hydras have lurker upgrade, just have it disabled cuz you can't use it.
- The firebat hero thing is pretty cool, that area though where all the bats are is somewhat undetailed and could use an overhaul. I would also give a hint to the player on using burrow to escape the firebats from chasing your units.
- Whats with the inside zerg base? Why are those units and buildings there, whats up with the cerebrate too? More information please!
- The 3 firebat heroes at the end of the map may be a bit much.
- Thats cool that you get an ultralisk, but why did you put a beacon by him?
- Lurkers are just sitting in an empty, undetailed room. Why don't you spice it up and show them killing some marines before going to your control?
- So Miss January gets killed randomly. So much for her, too bad her personality didn't get developed at all!
I'll play the other maps later, but I thought I'd give you some good feedback now.
